Gotcha Day

Today we are celebrating Gotcha Day! It's very exciting to look over the past year and see God's hand upon all of us. Especially Miss Nina-Li. I cannot tell you how important every prayer has been. Every kind word. Every protective gesture another mother has acted upon. Everyone that has touched Nina's life has just been a blessing each day.

One year ago, Nina-Li didn't speak English. Not a word. She could only draw circles and scribbles. She couldn't use scissors. Didn't know how to tell time (even in Chinese). Her hair was oh so short. She was scared, quiet, and 'developmentally' behind. She mostly ate congee, which is a rice soup. She had one close friend in China, Jing Jing, who was adopted almost 3 months before Nina-Li. Once Jing Jing was gone, she was lonely. (We are happy that we know where she lives and how to contact her. Maybe someday we will get to go see her.) Today, she is an American. She loves french fries and Sprite. She giggles and laughs all the time. She loves trying things new. She will usually try almost anything once (other than touching toads and snakes). She has an incredible circle of friends. And I want to thank Elizabeth and Addison in particular for being patient those first few months while Nina-Li was learning English. They would just sit and play quietly with her. I guess playing with dolls is a universal language.

Nina is incredibly friendly and will strike up a conversation with anyone. She is reading and learning sight words. She can count to 100, learning to add, knows how to tell time and enjoys Science. The hardest subject for her is history. I believe it is because she doesn't have a foundation of what the past is. She's never heard anyone talk about when they were little, or about 'a long time ago...'. At least that is my hypothesis. She is writing, and coloring, and drawing. I love her drawings, of big eyes, huge mouths and high heels. Sometimes she even adds eyelashes to the details.

She loves to paint and use scissors, help me cook, play dress-up and do all things girly. Because she missed out on sooo much she enjoys doing anything that a 3 year old would do up to a normal 8 year old.

Nina has gotten to experience life for the first time. From seeing rainbows and feeling the wind blow in her hair to running through grass barefoot, it has all been new to her. Most of her life was spent in a tall building with bars on the windows and smog filled skies that blocked the sun. Her world has indeed changed.

All of us have changed. I have an even fuller schedule than ever before. Bill and I have both learned that patience is a virtue we both need to increase. The boys are incredible with Nina. They love playing with her. From tea parties to wrestling they have done it all. They are both protective of her and seem to have filled the 'big brother' roles quite well in her life. Bill has learned that little girls are a lot different than little boys. All of us have enjoyed the sparkly life full of grace that has entered our home. I too have learned that I need to be a little more patient with Nina. I've also gone from two independent sons, to a little girl that needs a lot of time and attention. At times it is exhausting. However, my family has been great at helping me out. Our friends who have touched Nina's life have just been what we all needed. The Lovell's and Rutherford's have been so gracious. Denise has been a 2nd mom at times. Nina-Li will talk openly about China. She wants to go back some day for a visit. She'll tell me stories that will break your heart. She recognizes that she did not have a mommy or daddy in China. She told me of a time (that I have no records of) that she was in the hospital and had an I.V. in her arm. She said "I was very brave mommy. But I cried. I was scared. I had no mommy, nobody with me." I promised her then that if she ever had to go into the hospital again, she would have a mommy with her at all times. Once she shared another story about her nanny opening the window during the night and it was cold. She had no sheets or blankets. Other times she will tell me about her nanny taking her to school or home to play. She isn't bitter, just kind of matter-of-fact. One time about 2 months after Nina got home, I was getting frustrated. She follows me a lot around the house. And I had a very strong vision of her mother standing behind me. Telling me that she trusted me with her child and needs me to be the other she couldn't be for Nina. I will never forget that. I don't know what Nina's past is. But I truly believe after that, that Nina's mother loved her more than I can fathom. Isn't it the ultimate love? To recognize that your child needs more than you can give them. To sacrifice them in hopes that they will go to America and have something better. I cannot imagine the pain a mother feels after loving a child for two years to abandon her. Many times we question who could do such a thing. But, could it possibly be that she did it because she knew it was best for her daughter? She could have done something much worse that abandonment and gotten away with it possibly. I don't know. Whatever the true story is, we will never know. But, I do believe that Nina was loved beyond measure. Due to her ability to love. She was nurtured and cared for very well the first 7 years of her life. That has helped her bond to us. There is an excellent fiction book about a child from India called "Secret Daughter". Everyone I have recommended it to has enjoyed it. Nina-Li loves going to church. There is a teenage girl at our church, Kylee, who befriended Nina and helped her feel comfortable in class. We began her in the pre-school class, but now she is in the class with kids her age. Kylee was a huge blessing to Nina and helping her adjust. Many of the girls in the youth group are so kind to Nina and made her feel so important. Nina knows that she was a big present God gave us. And that mommy and daddy prayed for a little girl. That he told us he has a special little girl all the way in China that is just right for our family. And she certainly is. She is a McNay all the way and has adapted so well. Nina could be the poster child for older child adoptions. If all adoptions went as smooth as this, everyone would do it. As wonderful as it has gone we know we will have challenges, just like we do with our own biological sons. Nina will probably always struggle with self-esteem. Someday she will question how she got where she is and why. Right now she should be in 2nd grade, I am homeschooling her in first grade. Somethings she does remarkably well in, others she is a bit behind. It will take time to get her caught up. I am working hard to make sure she has a strong foundation of reading and writing and numbers. My mom helps me homeschool the three kids. Which gives me some flexibility. I believe that because we homeschool it has helped Nina feel loved and safe. Adopting a 7 year old girl, bringing her a foreign land, and sending her off to a school of strangers just wasn't an option for me. Even if we weren't a homeschool family, I believe it is something all families should consider to do briefly if adopting an older child. Not only has she bonded well with us and adjusted well. Her language development is incredible. Speaking of language, Nina is full English now. 3 months after she came, she asked me not to speak in Chinese anymore. 4 months after she came, she refused to speak Chinese. We now have her in Chinese to help her retain it. Not sure if she will hold onto it or not. As much as we want her to, I don't know what she'll do. She doesn't speak Chinese, but she says she understands it when she hears it. She cannot interpret it. But that is a huge brain function that is difficult to do. I now I have probably spewed a lot out in random order. So many of you have asked and been so caring. Thank you for your kind words, prayer and support. We are incredibly thankful for all three of our kids. And are amazed at God's remarkable ability to bring that one little girl amongst the millions in China to our little midwest family.

All Things New

Do you remember the pure joy you felt as a child? Maybe it was rolling in the grass, looking at the clouds above and the deepness of the vast blue sky. Maybe you felt it when you were attempting aviation with nothing more than a string and trash bag and you finally got it up in the air. Sometimes, if we are lucky we get to experience that again with our kids. However, even that seems to wear off at times. Having a third opportunity to re-live pure joy, how incredible it has been.
Nina-Li giggled when she felt the wind blow her hair for the first time. Not because she's never felt wind. Because her hair was never long enough to tickle her face. She was elated walking home from one friends house holding hands of two other friends. The simple joy of companionship was bursting from her soul.


Last Sunday for the first time, Nina woke-up crying from a bad dream. I went into her room and she leapt into my arms. Squeezing me so tight. We snuggled in my bed and she insured that my arms were wrapped around her until a bad memory was blotted out with joy once again. As she told a few others of the event, she never mentioned what the dream was about. She told them of her tears and that mommy came in and hugged her. I love the picture above. This was taken at the homeschool Valentine Party. The girls were all singing Ring Around the Rosie. Nina-Li hasn't learned the words to this song, but that didn't get to her. What does she do? She hops in the middle, and belly laughter of JOY comes bubbling out of her.
Do you ever hear those stories of how someone was wrongly accused and sentenced to prison, only to be free years later? Or someone lived in a coma for months or years and finally 'woke-up' one day?
EVERYTHING is NEW again.
This kind of joy, pure joy, is what I see in Nina-Li every single day. The life that is bubbling out of her is certainly a challenge to me and my faith. She is the living, breathing story of our salvation. Through Christ, the old is gone, the new has come. There's no looking back, there's no longing for the things of old again. I wish I had better words to describe the transformation that I have witnessed in Nina-Li's life. To say it is a blessing is putting it mildly. It is life changing. To close, I'd like to leave the words to Steven Curtis Chapman's song: You Make All Things New

You spoke and made the sunrise, to light up the very first day
You breathed across the water, and started the very first wave
It was You
You intoduced Your glory, to every living creature on earth
And they started singing, the first song to ever be heard
They sang for You

You make all things new
You make all things new

Then the world was broken, fallen and battered and scarred
You took the hopeless, the life, wasted, ruined and marred
And made it new

You make all things new
You make all things new
You redeem and You transform
You renew and You restore
You make all things new
You make all things new
And forever we will watch and worship You

You turn winter into spring
You take every living thing
And You breathe Your breath of life into it over and over again

You made the sunrise, day after day after day
But there's a morning coming, when old things will all pass away
And everyone will see

You make all things new
You make all things new
Come redeem and come transform
Come renew and come restore
You make all things new
You make all things new
And forever we will watch and worship You

Now and forever You are making all things new
You're making all things new

Hallelujah...

Memories are Coming Out

Nina-Li has been with us for three months. The past week she has been rejecting me speaking to her in Chinese. She tells me so 'bu dong, bu dong, I don't know.' bu dong means I don't understand. This is a normal part of international adoption. I don't know if she is foregoing her knowledge of Chinese. She still sings and listens to her Chinese CD's. But, she wants to know, understand, speak and be spoken to in English.
Yesterday, February 8th a couple of memories came out. I want to document them, just so I don't forget. We were looking at pictures of her in pre-school in China. Nina-Li remembered that her teacher's name was Lovey and sometimes Lovey took her to school. The other memory kind of saddened me a bit. I was tucking her in at night. She is obsessed right now with warmer weather, she wants it (don't we all). She asked if when it is warm if we can open her windows. She told me that her Ayi (pronounced I.E. which was her nanny)would open the windows at night when she was sleeping and she would be cold. She asked me what her sheet & blanket were called. After I told her she explained to me that she had no sheets and no blanket. That she said 'ayi it is cold'. I have seen a few pictures of her bed at the orphanage with no sheets or blankets. Just a mattress. I assumed that maybe they took them off daily to clean. However, now I wonder if she really didn't have those things. I used the opportunity to celebrate what she does have. She said her sheets and blanket are pretty. And then we talked about her room, and what mommy made, what daddy built, who bought what, etc. All because we love her. That helped her go to sleep on a happy note.

3 Months!

Hello! So many of you have been asking how Nina-Li is doing and shared with us how you followed our blog. It is such a blessing to know that so many care. Not only for us and specifically Nina-Li. But that so many are so supportive of the adoption process.
If Bill and I went to China, interviewed, played and hung-out with every child in the orphanage could we have chosen a better child to fit into our family than Nina-Li? She is truly a gift from heaven. Not only for us, but for those of you who are in our lives and have met her. She is a gift of joy and happiness. Reminding us to simply laugh at life and not take things so seriously. Which is easy for Bill and I to do right now.
The descriptions we received of Nina-Li always emphasized how quiet she was. That she didn't talk much and stayed to herself. It's as if she arrived and said "I can finally live the life I have dreamt of!" Everyday is filled with giggles of joy. There's no other way to describe it.

She adores her brothers. She loves running,chasing, hiding, climbing and tickling with them. She can be just as loud as they. Nina probably has the hardest time being separate from them if they leave. However, we have seen great improvements in that area. Last weekend, Dakota spent the night at a friends. She understood he was leaving, when he was coming back, and where he was going. It went very well. Nina-Li really likes to know where everyone is if someone is gone, or even in another room. However, she doesn't obsess over it. This is very common for adopted children.



Christmas was a dream come true for her. A few days before Christmas, Dakota told her Santa was coming. She was astonished! She couldn't believe that Santa was really coming this year, and that he was going to bring her something. Seeing Christmas for the first time through a 7 year olds eyes is magical.
Nina-Li is doing great with her language development. There are some sounds that are difficult to make. However, I couldn't be more pleased with her communication skills. And she understands us probably 90% of the time. My neighbor, Donna, got her the Leap Frog Letter Factory video. With many of the letters she knows their sounds before the name of the actually letter. So, that will help her tremendously with reading.


Nina has loved the snow. She'll go out there for hours with the kids and play. The day after the first really big snow she was outside for 3 hours! Loved it!
Many of you have asked how she likes her room. Well, she is just now noticing it. I know that sounds strange. However, it has been in the past couple of weeks she'll sit in bed at night and tell me what she likes about her room and how pretty it is. I told her that her daddy worked really hard to make it just for her. I told her what he built and painted. What I made for her. And she got it. It made her feel really good.
As far as school she is doing well. I am educating her as if she were in pre-k. Because no matter what she knew in China, she has to relearn it all in English. Her biggest struggle is with fine motor skills. However, she has come a long way. Her coloring, cutting, writing 3 months ago was that of a 2 year old. She can cut, draw simple shapes, & color very well (in the lines mostly). However, what I think is fun is her coloring style. Last week she was coloring an elephant. Well, her elephant was a striped elephant. Very impressive indeed! Nina is getting simple math concepts very well. Once she is able to identify numbers we will begin simple addition and subtraction.

I'm trying to remember all the questions people ask, so that I don't leave a stoned unturned. Food she is great with. I believe her diet mostly consisted of rice, fish and fresh fruits. I haven't given her much fish. Well, we could tell that because of her hair. When we first got her and I would give her baths, it was as if her hair wouldn't absorb water. It was so shiny and beautiful. Well, I'm not seafoods biggest fan, and it's isn't as easy to come by here as it was in China along the southern coast where she's from. Her hair is still beautiful black. However, not as shiny. So, I decided I needed to get her back on fish. I made it the other night and she loved it. Yeah! She really loves meat. There hasn't been much she turns down. Her favorite food is Gingaby. Oh, you don't know what gingaby is? Why french fries of course. No, you don't say french fries in Chinese that way. It is her own little word that she created trying to say 'french fries'. The 'f' sound is difficult for her to pronounce.
Nina is making friends and loves getting out. We went to Coco Key last week and she had a great time. It helped that a few of our friends were there that she knew. She gets a little nervous in crowds, but she just clings a little more than anything.
We are planning on participating in a couple of the Chinese New Year activities here in Kansas City. She doesn't know it, but I am going to let her wear a Chinese dress we bought. It is beautiful. She's been begging me to let her wear it. And next Friday she is going to a daddy/daughter dance and gets to wear it again. She loves dressing up.
We have also found a few of her friends from the orphanage and know how to stay in contact with them. Her best friend we found too. Once she returns from a vacation we hope the girls can skype each other.
Thank you so much for your prayers, support, kind words and deeds. We are all grateful!

Lots of Firsts

Nina-Li has been a McNay for 5 weeks and in the United States for 3 weeks. We are overjoyed at how well things are going for our family. Nina-Li often looks at photos through-out the house that we have. And sometimes has asked where she is in photos. (We do have some of her up). And it saddened me to think that she doesn't have a history recorded in photos as the boys do. Through the past couple of weeks, I have discovered, that although we weren't there for all of her milestones, there are some that we are there with. And seeing them through a 7 year old's eyes is a lot of FUN!
Many of us took our kids to see Santa when they didn't even realize who was holding them. As the kids grow older, their excitement to see Santa doesn't diminish, but the 'first time' is gone. Well, Nina's first time to see Santa at 7, was something magical. Her eyes literally sparkled.

We've had several firsts:
First Snow
First Bowling
First Santa
First Restaurant (of course several in China)
First French Fries
First Pizza
You know, all the important stuff. And she's about to lose her first tooth.
Nina is progressing quite nicely with her vocabulary. Although quite boring, I am going to attempt to list the words she says in English for my own benefit.
Yes, No
Momma, Daddy, Dawson, Dakota, Grumpers, Rocky
Home
Let's Go
Night Night
Love you
Elizabeth, Addison, Mara, Sandra and Cody
Cold
Ice Cream
Noodles
Water
Ice
Hurry, Hurry
Ouch
I don't know
One, Two, Three
And most importantly: yummy, yucky and stinky. Those 3 words alone help us out a lot! There's probably a few more that I haven't listed.
She can repeat several words after us. These are the words I hear her choosing to say with out prompting.


Nina-Li still loves make-up and playing dress up. As you can see, she was getting ready to go out with mom to visit a few friends from COR last night.
Nina-Li in our lives has changed us all. It's added a little more fun and sweetness to our life. Dawson (who hasn't kissed me goodnight since he was 5) has become more affectionate. And literally 2 nights ago, I got a kiss goodnight. WOW! That blessed this mom. He kisses Nina-Li goodnight and tell her 'wo ai ni' I love you. The boys think Nina-Li is sweet and love complimenting her on her 'fancy' outfits. Bill is totally smitten over Nina-Li and we both sat down to play tea with her the other night. She has taught me to slow down and just enjoy some giggles, play dough and make-up every once in awhile. Although it is hard to slow down, now that I am homeschooling 3 kids.
Speaking of homeschool, it is a little difficult balancing 3 kids. But, we are managing. They just seem to all need me at once. Hmm? How does that happen? Nina is learning to recognize her name and the alphabet letters in her name. We are also learning colors, shapes, and counting to 5 and then 10. She is behind with fine motor skills, so we spend a lot of time strenthening those tiny fingers and developing coordination.
Nina continues to sleep in her room alone and now wants the curtains closed and all the lights off. Sometimes she has a hard time falling asleep.
I honestly couldn't ask for things to go better.
I was telling my friends I saw last night I am so thankful for the gifts we have received. From earrings to those rubber dolls, a lot of them I wouldn't have thought to get. Nor, have I had the time to go shopping for these girly things. I know I haven't gotten those thank you notes out yet. However, know how thankful I am. Everytime she pulls something out or wears an outfit someone gave, I think of the person who blessed us with it. And the Target gift cards came in handy too. I cannot believe how many tights, socks and shoes alone we have needed. And I still need a few more!
Thank you for your support. I am overwhelmed by the number of people who followed our journey and have been so supportive. I hope our story is a blessing to you. And maybe there will be one or two who will consider adopting also.
Love to you all!

What I am Most Thankful For

We haven't been home a full week. I am amazed at how much Nina-Li has adapted to our home and family. I hope to write an update this weekend sometime.
Thanksgiving Silliness:

Daddy is sooooo Talllll!

A Whole New World

Nina-Li has been our daughter and the boys sister for 3 weeks. She's been an American for 1 week. It has become a whole new world for all of us.
There are some things I am learning about sweet little girly girls like Nina-Li:
90% of Barbie time, is all about the hair. Taking the little rubberbands out, brushing, brushing, brushing, maybe getting it wet, and brushing some more.
Playing is a universal language. It doesn't matter to Nina-Li what language you speak, how old you are, or what you are wearing. She is thrilled to meet you and play with you.
Party dresses or tutus should be worn daily. Life is worth celebrating and why not dress-up for the occassion.
Princesses and Strawberry Shortcake have healing power. Cute band-aids make it all better really fast.
Princess costumes can and should be worn to bed. Why make it an issue? Certainly sweet dreams will flutter by through out the night when worn.
Having a friend brings joy.
I am amazed at the progress we have made in a week. Especially considering how things were in China. She holds my hand often and doesn't want me out of sight. Which is completely normal. However in China, could care less where I was or what I was doing. Bill and Nina-Li are growing closer each day. Nina-Li loves riding on her daddy's shoulders. We took a walk today and she was full of giggles, which we hear daily, A LOT!
Everything is new to Nina-Li. Things you wouldn't think of. Like cups with glitter that swirls around and ice cubes. We've gone from warm water to now 2 ice cubes per cup of water. Last evening she was totally fascinated with the printer and copier. We copied numerous coloring pages. I was tempted to show her how to copy her hand, but I thought we'd have a few dozen copies of hands all over the house if I did. One of the most fascinating things to Nina-Li is blue sky. The first night we arrived home it was 11 PM, and she got to bed at 2 AM. She woke up 14 hours later at 6 PM and then went to bed late that evening. When I tucked her in bed (which went flawlessly), she got out a picture of our home and pointed to her window and then to the blue sky. I assumed she wanted to know when she was going to see daylight. I told her tomorrow (mingtian) she would see day. Well, the next day was sufficient, but cloudy. The following day, she came in my room and said "mama, mama, kan, kan". Which is 'mom, look!' It was the blue sky. At least that is what Bill and I have determined. In China we had sunshine everyday, but no blue sky. Too much smog. The smog was thick enough hardly anyone wore sunglasses.
It is fun watching her discover new things each day. From food to toys. She loves shopping and going places. She is content at home but loves to go out.
We are so proud of our boys and how they have handled the entire situation. Their character really shown through, through out the event. Through all the tears in China, they never once complained. Were always willing to lend a hand, and tolerated Bill and I being a little edgy at times. They never questioned Nina-Li being their sister and have been incredible big brothers. As I shared on Facebook, Kota told my mom "The moment I saw Nina she hypnotized me and made me love her." Wow! Times like that you feel like you are doing something right. Praise God. I kind of wonder how God will use this event to mold our sons into the men they will be someday. I realize now how compassionate they are.
I mentioned earlier that Nina-Li has been going to bed flawlessly. It is common for institutionalized children to not want to sleep alone. She had her own bed, but shared rooms with other girls. However, in China, our guide asked her if she wanted anyone to sleep with her in her room and she said no. And she has done great.
There's a lot she has to learn, like prayer. Why do we hold hands and close our eyes before we eat? And homeschool will be an adventure. Considering she doesn't know English and has to learn all her colors, shapes, numbers, and English alphabet, I am pretty much going to pretend like she is 3. She is a sponge when it comes to learning, so I think we'll have fun as she discovers new things.
I cannot tell everyone how much their prayers have sustained us. Your support and love have been immeasurable. I have no idea how many followed our blog, and will even read this post. But, it is so comforting to know how much people care. We are simply two parents doing what God called us to do. It was written on my heart before Bill and I got married in honor of my mom, who was also adopted. Bill has been incredibly strong when I was weak, and vice versa. We have been each others sounding board and comfort.
I will continue to post every once in awhile the progress Nina-Li makes.
Love to you all.

24 Hours Later

WE ARE HOME!!!!

We are home. And it felt so good to sleep in our own beds.

THE JOURNEY
Our travels went very well. I drew on a piece of paper three airplanes. The agency staff had told her we would be traveling on 3 planes. As we took each trip, we crossed off a plane. She slept a majority of the flight from Shanhai to Chicago. Which was good. However, when she woke up it was morning time in China. So, yep, you guessed it. Little Miss Sunshine wasn't very happy. It was shortly before we arrived in Chicago though. so, she cried only a tiny bit on the plane. And then the entire time going through customs and immigration. However, by the time we got on our flight to KC she was fine.

OUR ARRIVAL
What a wonderful welcome home. Bill went and got the van while we got our luggage. When I walked outside to our van, Nina-Li recognized it right away. (Yeah!) We have incredible friends who brought our van up to the airport. They left Nina-Li some gifts and treats for all of us. Thanks to our neighbor Elizabeth, I had step-by-step photographs of Nina-Li's carseat and how to use it. She got right in and didn't complain. In China no car seats, seat belts are optional. We listened to her Chinese children's CD's in the car, which she loved. We had a great ride home.

HOME
When we got home, Nina-Li was so excited. She ran through the house looking at everything, matching it all to the photographs embedded in her mind. She quickly went upstairs to see her room. She did the same thing. She was very happy. A response we were uncertain if we would get. She played in her room a lot discovering her books and the few toys she has. I read several times not to have a lot of toys right away. It can be overwhelming and over stimulating. I can see that was good advice. She had to touch and see everything. So, if she had a lot, she would have been up all night. She was uncertain to go up into her bed. I was nervous about that. Later I realized she was apprehensive climbing the ladder. Once I taught her how to go up and get to her bed, she was fine.

BEDTIME
We were up late. Obviously with the time change and the late arrival home. I was getting sleeping and told her momma was getting sleepy. The next thing I know I find her in bed looking at her books. Yeah! So we hung out while I commented on the pictures. It was way too late to read. So, I figured out she didn't want lights on and her curtains opened. She fell asleep and has slept for almost 11 hours now and still sleeping. No tears. Which we were prepared for. She has always been a sound sleeper, which is a benefit to all of us.

So, we'll see what our first day brings. Still trying to figure out what she wants for breakfast. I don't have a full breakfast buffet here at home, and she can't nibble and refuse as easily. I think I will need to learn how to make congee, which is a watered down rice that they often have for breakfast. Well, and almost all meals. That and fruit.

THE BOYS
The boys did a great job. So many people commented on what great brothers they are. How kind and good they were. They loved their trip to China. None of us want to be on an airplane for awhile, yet they are already wondering where we will go next. I'm afraid with our trip to Mexico last year and this year's trip to China they are becoming more interested in international travels. Ummmmmm, financing that might be an issue.

Thank you for all of your prayers. They sustained us greatly. I cannot tell you how much your words of encouragement helped me.

I apologize there are now pictures. I have to download all 1600 to my computer.

Love to you all!

Good-bye China!

It is our last evening in China. We will be waking up at 5:00 am (3:00 pm your time) and heading to the airport. From Guangzhou we will fly to Shanghai. We have a 6 hour layover there. So, we are considering taking time to ride the MAGLEV (magnetic levitation train) from the airport for a short round trip ride.

We leave there at 5:30 PM, 3:15 AM Friday while you are sleeping. And then will arrive in Chicago around 5:00 central time.

Today has been a good day. Little Miss Sunshine woke up grouchy. However, about 11:00 she was her sweet adorable self. We went shopping, which puts any girl in a good mood. I bought her two very nice Chinese dresses. They are beautiful. I got her one for now and one a size bigger. They were $25 each. Which if you were to see them, you would agree is a good price. I am very glad that I found them. Nina-Li loves them.

I took her down to our adoption agency's office. Catherine talked to her about our travels tomorrow. That Grandpa wouldn't be sitting with her all the time. Our early wake-up time, etc. She explained that Nina would have to wear a seat belt. The conversation was fun and Nina accepted and understood it all very well. Catherine told her, that her America name is Nina-Li and that it means beautiful little girl. Nina loved that. Then she added that every time someone calls her they will be telling her she is beautiful. Which made Nina giggle. She told her she had to wear her seat belt in the van because dad is a crazy driver. Nina giggled a lot at that. She also told Nina she has many people waiting to meet her that want to be her friend.

So, it's been a great day. Please pray for safe & smooth travels with no delays. We are all ready to come home. Including Nina.

Love to you all!

2nd to Last Update

I will have probably one more update from China before we leave. I hope to continue our blog once we arrive home. But, we will see what time allows. Again, thank you Danielle for keeping everyone informed, but I am sure you want to get back to our own routine of things.

We have had Little Miss for 11 days. We have come so far. Yet...we wonder what the road ahead will bring.

Yesterday and today Bill has been a pillar of strength. Standing ground with Nina and she has respected and followed it. Very good. She wants to be with my dad a lot, and we are trying to slow that down a bit. He wants to be Grandpa (in China it is Why Gong). He doesn't want to be dad.

Today was a good day. This afternoon she was a chatterbox as we played dolls and stuff together. I turned on the camera and tried to video it to post. But the file is too big to send. Sometimes I think she thinks I understand everything she is saying. However, it is amazing how even though we don't understand the words, we figure things out.

This evening we went on a riverboat ride on the Pearl River. it was beautiful. With the Asian games here (it is a huge deal), they have alot of the building s and riverfront decorated for the event. We had a great time. We were apprehensive, Nina was getting tired and we were afraid she was going to wail. But, Bill has really established what he expects from her and she followed through. She was able to overcome her sleepiness a bit to enjoy the lights& ride. But, was still very tired.

The boys are having a great time but are definitely ready to come home. They cannot wait to see all their friends. Today we went to a large store like a Wal-Mart and they bought Chinese candy to share with the kids. The grocery store part was Chinese market meets Price Chopper. There was everything from snake to chicken feet to live turtles, fish (alive and dead) to regular produce and pantry goods. The meat market was just raw meat on at the counter like ours, but the people choose and bag their own meat. Something a little unsanitary it seems about that.

We hope you are all doing well.

Love Ya!

Proud to Be an American

Today is citizenship day, well, kind of. Today we went to the US Consulate, and took an oath on Nina's behalf for her to become a US citizen once we hit US soil. It is and sounds more beautiful than the actual experience. We stood with 32 families and took the oath and then waited as they called our names to sign a piece of paper. Intermingled within the families were a half dozen or so Chinese immigrants applying to become US citizens also. A very proud day, yet the ceremony itself wasn't that glamorous.

The day began with little Miss Sunshine, being just that, sunshiny. She was unpredictably cheerful. Maybe because she sweet talked me into wearing her little Chinese outfit today. Whatever the case, she was so delightful at breakfast. That lasted until Grumpers walked off to go do something. Then, she cried and cried and cried. She is very close to him and doesn't want him leaving her. She can leave him to go somewhere, but he cannot leave her. He really didn't realize how much of an impact he has had on her life. This gives us some wisdom on handling our living quarters with her and him.

Nina cried off and on through out the morning as we traveled and enjoyed the local zoo. It was her first visit to the zoo and at times she was just crying to cry. I must share our zoo experience. The safari ride we had the animals so close. Dawson even had a camels backside pretty much to his face. There were several camels, several giraffes, several elephants. Things we may see 1, 2, or 3 of they had dozens. We also got to see black bears, white tigers and yes....Pandas. And they were oh so cute. I think there were 12, including 5 babies that were one year old.

After the zoo we went to the US Consulate and then returned to the hotel. Nina became her cute 7 year old self once here. Being adorable and sweet. Emotions can turn on and off very quickly. And understandably.

We are all missing home and cannot wait to get into our own beds. We miss our friends and family and Facebook. We miss Quik Trip and normal and I miss oatmeal. But as much as we miss things we try to remember that Nina misses everything 10 times more. I brought a small photo album showing Nina her room, how to use a car set (thank you Elizabeth Lovell for modeling!), our home, our dog, etc. She is getting it out more and more. So, I hope she is anticipating it or at least trying to understand it all.

Tomorrow night is riverboat ride night. We cannot wait. However, the evenings are cool and I lost my jean jacket in the last city. I have no idea how. That's the least of my concerns.

Love to you all!

4 days to go!

Well, it is Monday evening here in Guangzhou. We have 4 nights to go before we begin our long journey home. I cannot wait to begin a routine. I wonder if Nina thinks this is how we live and that there is a giant breakfast buffet available every morning.

Today went well and not so well. Clinic Day. And the actual exams went well, no problem. Then there was a long pause. Nina-Li is allergic to eggs and she needed 5 shots. Well, when I mentioned this, they were (as I was) concerned because some shots are in egg solution. So, they had to do research to find out exactly what the allergy was and if she can take two of them. So, we waited, and waited. She didn't like that wait. She was sad because Dawson and Grumpers went to go somewhere & they are who she is attaching to the strongest right now. Which triggered her wanting her nanny, which triggered...you got it....the tears. So, we went ahead and got 3 shots and they said she may have to return for the other two. Lovely. After she successfully finished the shots (with a lot of tears) I had a plan. Barbie. We got an adoption Barbie with a white mommy and an Asian baby. Unfortunately I don't resemble this Barbie, and would like to know what mom would wear the outfit she's wearing. However, I was able to negotiate with her when she stopped crying she got Barbie. Score one for mom.

So, we left and returned to the hotel and all was well. We played and went shopping. I let her choose her Chinese dress to purchase, which included a little skirt that has tulle on it. She was pretty happy for the rest of the day. She's a normal 7 year old. It is fun watch her just be a sweet little girl. She plays with all of us a little through out the day. When we tell her no and she will whine, but no is no. Like no you may not run through the restaurant or no you may not run in the street. But, she'll get it.

We realize that with almost every experience we give her, it is probably her first. First restaurant dinners, park visits, tomorrows zoo visit, Wednesday's river boat ride, etc. So, that is fun. It must be a lot for her to take in.

Tomorrow we are going to the zoo/safari in Guangzhou and then from there going to the US Consulate for our oath appointment. We cannot take anything in except our passports. No cameras, purses, etc.

Then Wednesday we go on on the river boat cruise on the Pearl River.

Thursday is mostly a free day and packing day.

Nina is getting closer to Bill. She doesn't want tickles, hugs or kisses. Who can blame her, she has only known us for 8 days. But, she interacts and plays with everyone now. She is responding well to Nina as her name. Mornings are not her best time of the day. She becomes a cute giggly girl after 11 or 12. And is pretty good for the rest of the day. At the orphanage she had a two hour nap supposedly everyday. at 12:30. Since joining the McNay's she's had two naps. Which she seems to be handling fine. A daily nap would be difficult with our schedule, but if I find she needs one once we get in routine, that is what we will do.

Love to you all.

Good Morning!

Well, while I am waiting for my girly girl to wake-up from her beauty sleep I thought I would write you again.

Yesterday went sooooo smooth, yeah God!

After lunch Nina and I watched Dawson & Dakota play in the cold pool. She tossed the beach ball to them and laughed. She kept putting her sunglasses on upside down. And she kept yelling at me to stop taking pictures. Great, a 3rd child who doesn't want their picture taken! However, I can accept that. So, now I am back to sneaking pictures.

We spent the rest of the evening in our hotel room coloring, playing dolls, etc. I don't know how many rubberbands she put in her pretend Barbie's hair that I had to pull out. This doll didn't have much hair to begin with, and now there's even less. Bill bought her a Beauty in the Beast book written in Chinese. Then we got her a rubber doll set, (still don't know what to call them!) at Wal-Mart that was Beauty in the Beast. So we matched the clothes we had to those in the book.
We are communicating pretty good, between my broken Mandarin (which I have needed so much!) and pointing, repeating, etc. She's getting it and saying words in English pretty well.

We've now had Nina for one week. I have an incredible family. Everything that I have talked about that we have experienced, my dad and the boys have been right there. Patient and strong. I am so proud of the boys for everything they have done. I told Dawson at one point if I could give him the world I would at that point.

Today is clinic day. Ready to get it over with.

No pics for now.

Love to you all.

Guangzhou continued...

Heh, the early bird gets the worm! Michelle is still sleeping, so I'm going to send an update now, muhahaha!!!

Yesterday was a very good day. Things started off with breakfast and a little girl in a bit of a sour mood.Things started picking up late in the morning while we were out on our walk. I've found out that she knows (already) how to work the eyes. I'm in big trouble. She did it to me first at the 7-11 (yeah, they have 7-11 here) when she wanted some gum. There is no use resisting such a force, ha!

Most of the afternoon was spent hanging out and playing in the room. Nina let me have alot of her time and seems to be tempering things alot better. We looked at books, she helped me eat a couple pears (she loves pears), did a little coloring, and practiced our conversation (her primary word right now is 'aaa', but if that fails, she starts chattering in chinese).

Lee and I went to go check out the local shopping area. There is a massive shopping district that is about a mile from here. 5 minutes on the hotel transfer service and we were there. Traffic here is still...well...chinese traffic, humorous as it is. When we got out we were amazed at the density of the area. Not only population-wise, but also with respect to their storefronts. The area greatly resembled about a half-scale Times Square. If your in Guangzhou and have a hankering for American fast food, this is where to go. There were 2 McDonald's, a Pizza Hut, Papa Johns, KFC, and probably a couple others that I didn't see. Also, as Guangzhou is primarily Cantonese, there is a street that showcases different items of food from noodles to scorpions (self-professed, the Cantonese eat anything but the table). Keep in mind your shoulder-to-shoulder with about 5 other people while walking amidst the stores (or eating your scorpions for that matter).

Stepping inside one of the shopping areas, your presented with a labyrinthian maze of incredible proportions. From the entry floor, there are escalators that go down and up. The storefronts are very much akin to slots in a swap-n-shop, as they are about 5-10 feet square and are rented out to people selling their wares. This adds to the whole density confusion. And if that isn't confusing enough, each of their escalators covers two floors, they are paneled with mirrors, and have mezzanine levels between the floors, so your left with a feeling of "how did I miss that area?".

So, after we gathered our bearings, and with a great appreciation for how tight you can pack things together, Lee and I grabbed McDonald's and walked back to the hotel (about a 15 minute mile). Nina wasn't that thrilled with the hamburgers, but she was totally into the wings that I picked up. Oh yeah, she is definitely a fry girl, but is kinda finicky about ketchup.

The night ended with looking at some books some more. She then let me put a bandaid on a papercut she got from the book...ha! Small things are big and you have to make the most of what you got. All to sleep, no crying, and this morning is starting out pretty good too.

Thank you all for your support!

Bill

Guangzhou is Beautiful

Greetings from Beautiful Guangzhou. (Gwonjoe)

We are off of the Pearl River on a tiny island called Shamien Island. From what I understand at one time the British (& French) I think once had something to do here. (Sorry, I've just had so much information poured into me I am losing details). For this reason that I cannot explain well, many of the buildings and architecture on British and French inspired, not Chinese. Speaking of the Pearl River, there are lots of celebrations due to the Asian Games and last night they had a boat parade you will see in a photo. We had a room change fortunately, so we have beautiful views of the river and the cityscape behind it.

Another of the photos is of Nina-Li curled up in her tiny bed. We decided to get her, her own bed to separate her a bit from the boys. It is a tiny little foam bed with sides and it was just her size. She loved it.

It was a lovely morning to walk around. There is a beautiful park along the Pearl river in which many people exercise and practice their Tai Chi, ladies do Chinese Line Dancing, and all ages play a version of hackey sack. There is a section of stair that go down into the Pearl River that locals use to swim in the river. The same river in which several cargo ships go up and down. This river is very similar to the Missouri River. Not sure it would be my top choice of exercise.
There are several bronze sculptures through out the island. I would love to get out one morning alone & just snap photos of them.

Today we walked through the park, Nina played at the playground, unsure of some of the playground equipment including the small tornado slide. But, she liked it. We did some shopping and got her a pretend Barbie and some sunglasses. We picked up our laundry. Yeah! Clean clothes. For 6 people we got laundry done for about $26. Not bad. It's been a good day for Nina so far. We can tell that mornings are her low point. She is very quiet. So after breakfast we quickly went outside for a change of scenery.

One of the most refreshing things for me today was breakfast at the White Swan. Several families are here adopting. And instead of the quiet tonations of the Chinese speaking, you hear the loud voices of Americans talking. I never noticed that sound before, because it has always been quite normal. Voices talking over a meal. However, we haven't heard that noise for almost two weeks and for some strange reason it was quite comforting.

Oh, and DENISE LOVELL, there is a sushi place in which you choose your flavor, from a TANK! And I never saw the sight at Wal-Mart we discussed, nor had our guide heard of such a thing.

Enjoy the photos.

Love to you all.

Now in Guangzhou

Ni Hao from Guangzhou. This is a very busy place, for this is the second night of the Asian Games. We were supposed to come last night, however our hotel was overbooked. I found out earlier that the President of Pakistan was at the same hotel last night that we are staying. I'm kind of glad we weren't here for all of that. I thought I saw some secret service looking people here earlier. I told Bill they had ear pieces and everything. Now I know why.

I apologize if I miss-communicated. Some of you may have thought that we were heading home, no, just here to Guangzhou. In Fuzhou, Fujian we had to address all the legalities for Nina to leave China according to the China govt. Here in Guangzhou is where the U.S. Consulate is. Now we have to address all the legalities of her coming home according to US law. I will try to give you the cliff note version. Every hour things change, progress, two steps forward, one step back. I love sharing these things with you. I hope I am not putting anyone to sleep.

O.K., so we're in Guangzhou. Our morning in Fuzhou wasn't smooth sailing. First of all, I had to wake Nina up at 5:30 AM. Not easy for any kid. But, especially for a kid who doesn't understand why she's being woken up and by someone who is claiming to be her mom after 7 days. So, understandable. However, once she saw our guide, you know it, she cried. She cried the hour long ride to the airport, at the airport and on the plane. This difficulty was two-fold. One, I could do nothing to ease her pain and reassure her. Two, the Chinese are very loving and very concerned. The stand and watch and stare for long periods of time. While Bill and my dad were checking in at the airport I was encircled by these sweet caring people staring at us wondering what was wrong. Fortunately, at our gate, two young moms knew enough to understand the problem and helped me reassure her. Then, on the plane the helped. The flight attendants helped and the lady behind us helped. God sent many helpers my way (God is meeting our needs, thank you for the prayers). On the plane she would have been fine other than the seat belt. Didn't like it. (That's going to be a challenge in the van!) 1/3 into the flight she was fine.

Once we arrived in Guangzhou, Nina was quiet and mad but not crying. We had to go to the medical clinic first thing for a TB test. This test is where the inject something under the skin layers to see if there is a TB reaction. I was certain we were going to hear screams. The orphanage reported she cannot stand going to the doctor. However, it was smooth sailing, piece of cake.

The week in a nutshell:

Monday we go get Nina's picture taken for her travel Visa.
Go to Medical Clinic for exam (yeah! what fun!)

Tuesday is our US consulate Oath-taking Ceremony. Official family day. However, no pictures, allowed.

Thursday we pick up her Visa and we are free to go.

Which we will on Friday. We fly from here to Shanghai, then to Chicago and then home. We will finally hit our door step around 1:00 AM on Saturday. After 30 hours total of travel time. Oh begin praying for that one. I just calculated those numbers for the first time.

So, may I bore you more and tell you about my daughter. She is incredibly meticulous. She takes at least 4 minutes to brush her teeth, with a very strict routine of brushing and rinsing. Then she washes her little sweet face. She can wring every drop of water out of a wash cloth. She doesn't like anything on her, at all, and wants her socks & tights very straight and even with her toes. She giggles so adorably. And runs and skips like any other little girl. However, this little girl has had her world rocked, and she can still find moments to giggle, skip and hop. Yeah! She adores my dad and doesn't want to leave him behind when we go places.

I look forward to when she can call me mama and say a few words other than a! (short a). But, we understand that, and some of her Mandarin and have our own little charade interaction going on.

Nina is warming up to the name Nina and responding when we call her that. She also is warming up to Bill. He taught her 'give me 5'! So, thank you thank you for your prayers. They are being answered and giving me strength.

Sorry no pics right now. We will get some tomorrow.

Love to you all!

P.S. Stay tuned, Bill is going to send an update.

One more update from Fujian

It is our last evening in Fujian and your prayers are working. We went through the entire day with no tears, at least for her Ayi. So, thank you to all of you who are praying for us. We had a wonderful day as I mentioned with the amusement park. However, we had a meeting to get Nina's passport. It was in the same room we got her from, so we were fearful she would cry. When she saw our guide Tracee, she asked if she was going to see her Ayi. I recognize the word now. I said no, and she kind of moaned, whined, wanting to cry, but didn't. Then we thought she might cry when we left, thinking that she would want to go with Tracee, but all was well.
We are packed. Which also carries good news, because Nina-Li allowed me to pack some of her things she has been cramming in her backpack into her suitcase we bought her here. Another huge accomplishment. It is common for kids to cling to their belongings when going through this. So, she showed a lot of trust. And she is seeing all of us pack our things. So, we will see how tomorrow morning goes. Our guide will explain to her we are going to the airport and going to fly where other children are that she can play with.

So, today we have had a lot of giggles and skipping and sweetness.

Love to you all

Thank God it's Friday!

Thank God It's Friday! For more reasons than Friday. We have had a great day today. So far....

Nina-Li woke up and ignored us a bit, but she does that everyday. Once she is ready, she warms up to us. Fortunately, it didn't begin in tears. I allowed her to choose from two outfits to wear today and helped her get dressed, we went to breakfast, and then finished getting ready for the day. She is very meticulous. She brushes her teeth for at least 4 minutes, and has a specific routine. She then washes her face and hands. She doesn't like anything on her.

I should back up to last night. When we returned to dinner, she saw Dawson's socks, and gave them to him, telling him to put them away. He said, "Great, now I have two moms!" I went to bed early exhausted. However, I guess the three kids had a peek-a-boo event with lots of giggles.

Back to this morning. After getting ready the kids played hide-and-go-seek. Lots of fun and laughter. We then hit the boardwalk and went to the small children's amusement park. There were 100's of kids there for field trips. Many of them in uniforms for school. Many of them noticed us and tried out their English on us by saying 'hello'. One little girl came up, said hello, asked me my name, told me hers and then asked if I spoke Chinese. It was a conversation she was very proud she had in English.

We had room service lunch and Nina-Li even took food from Bill. So, although she doesn't want him to touch or by close to her, we are taking baby steps.
Our guide just visited with us and gave us a big clue to Nina's behavior. She thought that it was odd that a child from an orphanage was so angry, so she has called the orphanage daily trying to figure out what the deal is. (Tracee has been doing this for 15 years). Well, today, she found out that the caretaker that Nina was closest to attempted to adopt Nina-Li. However, it was rejected probably due to our paperwork already processed.) This caretaker called Ayi not EI like I thought, treated Nina-Li as her own daughter and wanted her very badly. And we speculate that she probably told Nina that too. Now we understand why this is harder. It is as if she was a foster child instead of an orphanage child. And it confirms that Nina-Li has the ability to love and attach to us as a new family and to future relationships. All good news. Just a painful process for her to experience.
So please enjoy these pictures, a delightful day brought to us by God. We leave early in the morning and expect tears as we head to airport, as she will want to return to the orphanage. However, your prayers are sustaining us and being answered. We will be leaving the hotel at 6:00 AM our time, 8 PM your time on Friday. Please, pray for a good drive and flight for Nina.

Thanks for the emails. And I am getting Facebook posts via the email system.

Love to you all.

Signs of Life in China

Today is Thursday, and it is has been rough. Nina-Li (whom will are still calling Ruan Ruan, not sure when she will be ready for the name change) woke-up crying today. I wonder if she goes to bed she hoping that she will wake-up at the orphanage. It just breaks your heart. You know the pain this sweet child is going through. I cannot hold and rock her, no one can speak the right words in any language to comfort her and you just have to let her grieve. From what I have read in the past year, it is good that she is grieving right away. And it is simply good that she is grieving. This indicates that she has the ability to love, to care, to bond with us in the future. I don't mean to dwell on this. She is very sweet, soft spoken and fun when she is not thinking of the orphanage. Writing this blog is somewhat therapeutic for me I guess.

Nina stopped crying about 45 minutes later and we went to breakfast. But, once back in the hotel room, she cried, and cried, and cried. Grumpers and the boys went to ride the peddle boats at the lake in front of the hotel. While Bill and I sat here, played cards, letting Nina-Li just cry it out. For two hours. We don't know what else we can do, but provide a safe environment for her to do so. She cried so much she got a head-ache. And she allowed me to give her some Children's Advil. So, it shows me she is trusting me. She relies on me to help her in the restroom, give her baths, help brush her teeth, get dressed, and of course, put on make-up. And some of these things, she really doesn't need my help. My friend Angela who adopted a year ago, advised me to create needs. Create situations in which Nina-Li needs me. Good advice.

After Nina cried for about 2 hours, we asked her if she wanted to take a walk, and she did. So, we walked a small garden behind the hotel and then went down to the boardwalk. She held my hand almost the entire time. We eventually ran into the boys with Grumpers. We listened to the retirees singing like a church choir and then returned to the hotel. Both boys ran hand in hand with Nina down the board walk. I think Nina even smiled a tiny bit.

We've spent the afternoon hanging out and taking naps. We got Nina on pbskids.org and showed her how to play a game or two. She even let Bill help her. But, she's refusing chocolate from him, hmmm?

I think we are going to go bowling in a bit and then find dinner.

Tomorrow our plans are to go to the small amusement park by the island I described. Then we pack. We have to leave the hotel by 6 AM Saturday to leave for the airport. I am dreading the flight with Nina but looking forward to the last leg of our trip to Guangzhou (Gwanjoe).

Here are a few pictures of life in Fuzhou.

Love to you all!